Signed,

Curious and a Little Nosy

A:

Dear Nosy,

Well, you are right on both counts. I do practice what I preach … most of the time! I like to quote my pal Walt Whitman to answer for any inconsistencies you might find any herein: Of course I contradict myself. I contain multitudes. That said, I’m going to pull back the covers and reveal my bedtime routines, quirks and all, as I address each of your nosy questions below:

What Your favorite bedtime snack?

A lot of sleep experts frown on them, but I’m a fan of bedtime snacks. As someone with low blood sugar and a speedy metabolism, a little snack at bedtime helps me sleep better. While in general, I try to eat a diet high in whole foods and low on sweets, my last bite before bed is often carb-rich—and sometimes chocolatey. That’s because carbs help us feel cozy and sleepy. For me, that might mean a small bowl of cereal and milk or a slice of toast and butter.

What bedtime rituals work best for you?

My friends and family know not to call me after 9 p.m. That’s because an hour or more before bed I start to “unplug.” I close the laptop and stop answering my phone. I usually meditate in the evening, stretch, and read (an actual physical book) before bed. But yes, sometimes I cheat and do something that involves a screen. But that’s just between us, okay? Don’t blow my cover.

Is there a sleep rule that you occasionally break (like reading or watching TV in bed)?

The sleep rule I break with abandon is to get out of bed if I can’t fall asleep. I figure if I can’t sleep I may as well stay warm and cozy under the covers. So, I use that time to “beditate” instead (meditate in bed). I might also write down any dreams I’ve had thus far in the night in my dream journal.

How have you set up your bedroom for sleep success?

This is where I follow my own advice to the letter: I keep the bedroom dark, clutter-free, and electronics-free. Most importantly, I outfit my bedside table for cozy sleep: I have a lamp with a dimmer switch so I can turn it up to have enough light to read by before bed, and so I can dim the light to write dreams by in the night without waking my husband. I also stock my bedside table with:

• A sleep mask,
• ear plugs,
• lotions and oils for before bed foot and hand massages,
• an amethyst crystal to bring on healing dreams,
•  and of course, a pencil and notebook for writing down dreams or jotting down any inspired ideas I might wake up with.

What do you do when you can’t sleep?

I view sleeplessness at night as an opportunity. I use the time to “beditate” (meditate in bed). Also, if I want to experience lucid dreams (dreams in which I know I’m dreaming) I practice breathing techniques to bring on lucid dreams. Or, if I just want to fall back asleep quickly, I might choose a random letter from the alphabet and think of (and picture in my mind’s eye) as many things as I can that start with that letter. This is said to help prepare the brain for sleep and dreams because the randomness of the images imitates the brain activity of dreaming. Also, it’s better than letting my mind wander to worries or plans, which will surely keep me up.

What’s the best advice you received from your parents growing up about sleep?

As a child, when I couldn’t sleep my mother would say, “Don’t worry about falling asleep, just try to rest and relax.” I have found that’s the best advice I can offer, too. Unfortunately, the boom in books and blogs about sleep has had an undesirable counter-effect: People have become so anxious about sleep that fretting over how many hours they log on the pillow exacerbates their insomnia. Instead, if we aim to rest and relax in bed, and stop worrying about accumulating X number of hours, we’re more likely to sleep and dream well, and wake rested.

How did your interest in sleep and dreams begin?

I’ve been fascinated by dreams since I first began talking about mine at about age 4. And you can’t dream if you don’t sleep. So, my love for dreams led me to study sleep. I have a certificate in dream studies from the Institute for Dream Studies, where I am the educational director, I’m an active and engaged member of the International Association for the Study of Dreams. My book, “The Mindful Way to a Good Night’s Sleep” brings together the complete cycle of consciousness: Sleep, dreams, and waking.